E10 - Soul on Fire: Reignite Your Spark, Define Your Dreams, and Make Your Money Work for the Life You CRAVE
Align Your Dreams and Dollars: A Guide for High-Achieving Women Ready to Own Their Money
Hey friend, I've been thinking... If the point of building wealth isn’t to live a life better than you’ve ever dreamed, then what are we even doing? I mean, honestly. If you’ve been feeling a little meh about your goals lately—like, “I’m grinding, but is this really getting me anywhere?”—then consider this your dream life glow-up. Grab your iced latte, a notebook, and maybe light a candle. Today we’re talking about lighting up your heart, soul, and of course… your wallet.
Why Ambition Isn’t About Showing Off
We work hard and make money not to impress anyone. Nope. It’s about freedom—the kind where your calendar, spending, and energy actually match the woman you want to be.
The clearer you are on that life, the easier it is to align your money to get there. Otherwise, we just follow the path society hands us:
Get the job
Buy the house
Upgrade the SUV
Take the two-week vacation after asking for permission
…then wonder why we feel stuck on the hustle girl hamster wheel.
You didn’t come this far to stay tired and anxious about money. You’ve worked your ass off to have options. So let’s make sure your money is actually giving you exactly that: freedom, flexibility, and confidence.
My “Wake-Up” Moment
When I graduated college, I landed my dream job in New York City. Sounds amazing, right? On paper, it was perfect: decent salary, beautiful Soho office, all the buzz of the city. But here’s the catch—I was burning out hardcore.
I was working 60+ hours a week, commuting three hours a day, and my social life? Nonexistent. I literally fell asleep everywhere: bars, friends’ houses, with my boyfriend. And I thought: if I don’t make a change, I won’t even recognize myself by 30.
So I followed one of my dreams: I moved to L.A. with my boyfriend (now husband), chasing work-life balance. Goodbye New York hustle; helloooo freelance life (and figuring out wtf money even means when your income is variable). Cue stress, uncertainty… and the beginning of my obsession with financial independence.
The Balancing Act: Now vs Later
Freelancing gave me a gift: time freedom. But it also sparked a question that still guides me today:
How much do I need to work now to have the life I want later, while fully living in each season of my life?
I realized that the people in the FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early) community were doing it all wrong for me. They were sacrificing the present for the future, living stingy and tight just to retire early. And then I had my own moment of clarity: life is uncertain. Friends, family, health—they won’t always be there. Why save everything for 65 when I could live fully now and later?
That tension between what I want now and what I want later became my financial north star. Every decision—work, spending, investing—has been filtered through that lens.
Dreaming Big Without Playing Small
Here’s a little exercise I do when I need a “dream glow-up”. First, get yourself setup.
Find a cozy, calm spot—maybe a coffee shop, a hike, or my personal fave - on an airplane.
Put on your favorite Soul Searching playlist. (Try Roary, Elskavon, and Tycho if you need ideas!)
Take three deep breaths. Let the stresses fade.
Imagine you’re financially secure. Your needs are covered now and later. How would you live your life? Get really specific! Consider:
Friends and family
Experiences and adventure
Health and fitness
Work and purpose
Hobbies and personal expression
Giving and legacy
Don’t play small here. Dream big. If it feels scary, you’re doing it right!
Take a minute and really imagine this life. How would you feel waking up in it? What would your energy feel like?
A few examples to get you going:
Free. Grounded. Energized. Peaceful. Lit up. Confident. Unapologetic.
Now imagine that your doctor tells you that you have only 5-10 years left to live.
You won't ever feel sick, but you’ll have no notice of the moment of your death. What will you do in the time you have remaining? Will you change your life? How will you do it? (This question does not assume unlimited funds.)
Finally, imagine your doctor tells you that you’ve got 24 hours to live.
Notice what feelings come up. Then ask yourself: What did I miss? Who did I not become? What didn’t I get to do?
Values Are Your Compass
Once you’ve dreamed it, ask yourself: why?
Who inspires you? What about them lights you up?
When were you happiest or most proud recently? Cooking for friends, finishing a project, a hike?
If you could spend your money, time, and energy only three ways this year, what would they be? That’s alignment — the stuff that feels good and energizing, not stressful.
For me, those three priorities are: time freedom, relationships, and personal growth. That’s why I take five-week vacations, prioritize family, and spend time exploring personal growth—all guilt-free.
The things that don’t matter? Cut them ruthlessly. For me: material things, eating out, and housing. Low housing costs = freedom. Big house = more time at work. Your values will guide your spending every single day, and make you feel GOOD about your choices.
Enjoy the Journey: The “Becoming Era”
Here’s the part I struggle with the most: enjoying the journey. I’m wired to work, push, and plan endlessly for the future. But if you don’t pause to celebrate, you’ll never feel wealthy.
Case in point: yesterday I took my daughter hiking. Backpack on, music going, she was loving it, I was loving it, and it hit me: this is my dream life! I’m present, aligned with my values, living wealthy energy now, not just someday in the future.
Ask yourself:
What would your past self be proud of?
What three things do you love about the path you’re currently on?
Where can you add more play into your life?
Financial freedom isn’t just about hitting goals. It’s about enjoying the path along the way.
Where Dreams and Dollars Clash
Here’s where most people stumble:
Spending on things you don’t actually value
Locking money in assets that limit flexibility
Over-investing in long-term accounts while ignoring near-term joy
Feeling guilty or restricting spending when your finances are actually fine
The American Dream sold us a script: work hard, buy stuff, retire late. But if you want 35-year-old joy, you need a custom plan that aligns money with dreams.
How to Align Your Money With Your Dreams
Here’s the blueprint:
Clarify goals, values, and priorities. Know what matters now and later.
Understand your investments and savings. What’s long-term? What can be accessed for current experiences?
Spend in alignment with what truly matters. Ruthlessly cut what doesn’t.
Example: I could work more for a vacation home or bigger car. But I’d rather spend time with my daughter. That’s power, clarity, and freedom all rooted in understanding my money.
Your Takeaways
Dream boldly, and don’t play small. Your life is yours to design.
Know your values—they’re your compass for guilt-free spending.
Enjoy the journey. Wealth isn’t just a number; it’s a feeling, a lifestyle, an energy.
Align money with dreams. Your portfolio should support your life, not just your future retirement.
Next Steps to Take Control
If you’re ready to stop feeling disconnected from your money and start feeling empowered, confident, and free, here’s what I recommend:
Grab my free guide: Three Things Every Woman Should Know About Her Investments. Learn the top drivers of investment returns and spot them in your own portfolio.
Join my newsletter for tips on personal finance for women, investing basics, and cultivating the right money mindset.
Remember: once your money aligns with your dreams, there’s no going back. Less stress, more freedom, and options you didn’t even know you could have.
Your wealth isn’t just about dollars. It’s about designing a life you’re obsessed with. Dream big, spend intentionally, invest wisely, and enjoy every step of the journey. Your 35-year-old, 50-year-old, and even 80-year-old selves will thank you.
Don’t do it alone. Share this post with your bestie and start building wealth, freedom, and confidence together. 💖
